I don't want a darkened heart.

Romans 1:21

"For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened."

Wow. I do not want that.
For a while I was sort of under the impression that as long as I knew God, I would be ok. But I've got my part to do. He didn't call me to honor Him as God and give thanks to Him for nothing.

It scares me that it is possible to know God but become futile in thinking with a darkened, foolish heart. Stuff just got real when the truth hits me that we humans can taste the goodness of God and then still turn away. At the same time it's beautiful because God doesn't force us to love Him. Because of this though, God allows our hearts to be darkened if that's what we choose. I do not want a dark heart. Gross.

He has given me the option and I can take it or leave it. To leave it though would mean a great deal of unpleasant things for me, not the least of which is a darkened heart.
It is possible to be lukewarm, at least for a while. That implies that at one point, you were hot and are now on your way to being cold or never even got hot to begin with. But I think even a person very limited in Spiritual knowledge has heard what God has said about people being lukewarm: He will spit them out of His mouth.
Nobody wants to put something back in their mouth after they've spit it out. I'm not saying that once God has spit you out there isn't hope or whatever, but let's not find out the hard way.
Today I'm just musing on this verse that the Lord put on my mind. Sometimes, there's a time to talk about the straight up truth, no matter how unpleasant it may sound. I can choose to be offended by this verse, or I can choose to take heed from it (same with every other verse from the Bible). I pray that you and I will both choose the latter; to honor God as God and give thanks to Him. After all, we have every reason to.

We Meet Again

Well, to say that it feels weird to be here again is an understatement. This is a little emotional for me and I'll try to explain why. Firstly, it's been a while since the last time I wrote here. When I typed the address into the search bar, I was actually surprised that a 404 page didn't show up and that, instead, I saw a familiar title and design come up on the screen. There it was - my own writing, published on a web page I undoubtedly spent hours adjusting and tweaking until it was just right, down to the blue and green squares I painted by hand, scanned into a computer and digitized the old fashioned way with....wait for it.....*Microsoft Paint*. Illustrator? Pshht. Who needs that when you've got the grandmother of graphic design tools for FREE on your receptionist job work computer? (sarcasm, of course. Adobe, baby, I love you.) But even the details and designs of this page speak to the reason why this is emotional for me. All of the things about this blog that ...

Seasons: The Future

So about the future. I obviously don't know it so it makes sense that this one might be a little shorter (or longer-it could logically go either way, I just went with shorter). There are litterally (at least) a hundred different ways it could go. After the internship I'm doing, I might stay on there. Or I might come back here. If I come back here I could work, go away to college, take classes from home, live with my parents, move out with some friends, get some kind of certification and work a more specific job, come back to the office job I have now, etc. Or I could move to CA and live with some family and find a job with some distant cousins. Or I could move to some other random state and adventure there. The list of possibilities goes on and on. What sounds best to me right now is to do one of the aforementioned options that have to do with moving back here but we really will see won't we.

Lipstick marks on coffee cup lids.

This is one of those posts where I'm riskilly honest. The kind where I don't sound politically correct but I hope you'll hear me out. Where I admit things I'm not proud of. Ready? Okay. I used to ABHOR lipstick marks on coffee mug lids (as can be seen in photo below). There, I said it. Now the funny thing to me is that the cup with the lipstick marks on the lid that you see in the picture belongs to none other than yours truly. So let me explain. I used to be the girl who subconsciously thought she was better because she didn't need lipstick to feel pretty or 3 coats of mascara just to leave the house. I was proud to only wear a little bit of makeup (or none at all) and still feel like I looked like my normal, averagely pretty self. When other girls talked about needing to reapply lipgloss or eyeliner, (especially in front of guys) I made it a point to not be lumped into their shallow activity and went out of my w...

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