Last August I wrote a post, half the year in review, in which I summarized January to August, 2012 in my own words and I've been thinking of how it might just be time to do that sort of thing again.
I'll pick up in August for a little review of my review...
August: Here's what I said in the previous post about August:
Here's from now about August:
looking back on August from here, I see that I gained a lot of freedom in August. Mostly from liking this guy that I had liked for a long time (and had dated, although we had only dated for about 3 weeks in October 2011, we still sort of had a romantic relationship going on to some degree).
In August, he told me that he wanted to just be friends. Normally, I would let my mind think "Oh, he was just saying that. Deep down, he doesn't really mean it."
But when he said it, he looked at me. He looked at me in a way that let me know he meant it because he looked at me like someone looks at a chemistry experiment that may or may not combust. He looked at me to see that I was going to be okay. If he didn't mean what he had said, he wouldn't have looked at me that way. But he really did mean what he said.
Maybe he didn't even know he looked at me that way, but I'm really glad he did because it let me know that I could let go, and I did.
Following that, I spent the summer not doing anything too outstanding. I watched the Olympics (See picture to the right, where I proudly represent team U.S.A.).
I wrote poetry, blog posts and in my journal. Some related and some not related to the above. But mostly about the Lord. Because I got to know Him in a new way once my relationship with Him didn't depend on my relationship with any guy.
I went running when the heat was bearable and hung out with friends.
September: In September, my grandpa turned 94 and I went skydiving with my dad for the first time ever.
My friend Jake joined me in my running endeavors and that would usually turn into long walk talks afterword during which I found that I was gaining a close friend in him. I realized that he was someone trustworthy of pouring my heart out to and he meant more to me than just a running buddy. But, contrary to popular belief, I didn't like him like that then.
October: October was kind of like more of September except the weather was getting colder which prohibited as much running as Jake and I did in previous months. It was a little odd because Jake and I were used to running and having lots of time together walking and talking and now it just would've been weird if we'd hung out one on one. So it sort of forced us to find a solution to that since we really liked being with each other. I don't know when exactly, but by October we both had also decided that we liked each other. We kept becoming better friends and talked about dating. At that point though, I was still planning to go do an internship halfway across the country. So while we thought of dating, we thought it wouldn't be anytime soon.
November: November is probably my favorite month of the year. Not because it's my birth month(though that might have some influence in the matter :p). November isn't usually super cold, but it's cold enough that you can cuddle up with a blanket, some hot drink and a book and people won't question you for acting so introverted. Also it's thanksgiving month, plus lots of pumpkin spice-flavored drinks and baked goods. Mmm.
November wasn't all pumpkin spice lattes and pie though. November brought me a hard decision: the one where I decided not to go to IHOP. But in that decision (although I didn't finally decide until December), there was so much peace from the Lord. That's how I'd recap November in 1 word if I had to: peaceful. Despite the drama, peaceful.
Among the good things of November though (and there really were a lot of good things) I went on a mini-roadtrip to Indy with my friend Lisa to go see the Icarus Account. That was a good time.
December: Jake and I kept becoming closer and closer of friends and more than friends. We talked seriously about dating, but waiting a few months to do so. But then, at the end of December, through a good look at ourselves, we realized that we were really dating and just not calling it that. So December 29th, we decided to make it official (after he talked to my parents about it). That was a nice day. :)
On the 31st of December, I took a trip to Chicago with my friend Abby to be with our friend Lauren for New Year's Eve. That is a really sweet memory for me.
In the same way I do on most other New Year's Days, I spent time thinking about how it was a new year. I thought about some of all that had happened over the old year. I prayed that the Lord would use me in the next year. I was thankful to Him for showing His character and goodness through so many things over the last year and looked forward to what the next year would hold.
Obviously, we're a few months into 2013 by now but to make these "half-year reviews" more organized, I'll just stop there for now.
I'll pick up in August for a little review of my review...
August: Here's what I said in the previous post about August:
The beginning of August was sort of rough again. The last week of camp was the first week of August and the week after that is always kind of rough since you're going through withdrawals. Plus, the Lord MADE me lean on Him. I mean I could've leaned the other way and had a wrong response I guess. What I'm saying is, some things really sucked for me at the beginnnig of August (relationships-wise) and my only real option was to lean on the Lord (which is good cause that's what I'm supposed to be doing anyway). My heart was vulnerable right on down to the very depths of it, but Jesus just held it in His hands until the storm blew over and I could breathe again. I guess I'm still learning how to react to that storm but I trust that He'll help me. So that brings us to now.
Now what?
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| When it comes to summertime and funnel cakes, YOLO it. |
looking back on August from here, I see that I gained a lot of freedom in August. Mostly from liking this guy that I had liked for a long time (and had dated, although we had only dated for about 3 weeks in October 2011, we still sort of had a romantic relationship going on to some degree).
In August, he told me that he wanted to just be friends. Normally, I would let my mind think "Oh, he was just saying that. Deep down, he doesn't really mean it."
But when he said it, he looked at me. He looked at me in a way that let me know he meant it because he looked at me like someone looks at a chemistry experiment that may or may not combust. He looked at me to see that I was going to be okay. If he didn't mean what he had said, he wouldn't have looked at me that way. But he really did mean what he said.
Maybe he didn't even know he looked at me that way, but I'm really glad he did because it let me know that I could let go, and I did.
I wrote poetry, blog posts and in my journal. Some related and some not related to the above. But mostly about the Lord. Because I got to know Him in a new way once my relationship with Him didn't depend on my relationship with any guy.
I went running when the heat was bearable and hung out with friends.
My friend Jake joined me in my running endeavors and that would usually turn into long walk talks afterword during which I found that I was gaining a close friend in him. I realized that he was someone trustworthy of pouring my heart out to and he meant more to me than just a running buddy. But, contrary to popular belief, I didn't like him like that then.
October: October was kind of like more of September except the weather was getting colder which prohibited as much running as Jake and I did in previous months. It was a little odd because Jake and I were used to running and having lots of time together walking and talking and now it just would've been weird if we'd hung out one on one. So it sort of forced us to find a solution to that since we really liked being with each other. I don't know when exactly, but by October we both had also decided that we liked each other. We kept becoming better friends and talked about dating. At that point though, I was still planning to go do an internship halfway across the country. So while we thought of dating, we thought it wouldn't be anytime soon.November wasn't all pumpkin spice lattes and pie though. November brought me a hard decision: the one where I decided not to go to IHOP. But in that decision (although I didn't finally decide until December), there was so much peace from the Lord. That's how I'd recap November in 1 word if I had to: peaceful. Despite the drama, peaceful.
Among the good things of November though (and there really were a lot of good things) I went on a mini-roadtrip to Indy with my friend Lisa to go see the Icarus Account. That was a good time.
December: Jake and I kept becoming closer and closer of friends and more than friends. We talked seriously about dating, but waiting a few months to do so. But then, at the end of December, through a good look at ourselves, we realized that we were really dating and just not calling it that. So December 29th, we decided to make it official (after he talked to my parents about it). That was a nice day. :)On the 31st of December, I took a trip to Chicago with my friend Abby to be with our friend Lauren for New Year's Eve. That is a really sweet memory for me.
In the same way I do on most other New Year's Days, I spent time thinking about how it was a new year. I thought about some of all that had happened over the old year. I prayed that the Lord would use me in the next year. I was thankful to Him for showing His character and goodness through so many things over the last year and looked forward to what the next year would hold.
Obviously, we're a few months into 2013 by now but to make these "half-year reviews" more organized, I'll just stop there for now.