50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind: 18

I went a little bit out of order because, in all honesty I'm in a strange mood tonight. Actually it's not too strange at all because I find myself feeling this way very often. Sort of a romantic, very emotional, but also melancholy feeling. I don't feel like going further into it but I wanted to find a question whose answer I felt like answering. So number 18 it is.

18.Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?

Yes. In fact I am. I know I'm holding onto something that's a very big deal (and a lot of other little things that someday might become big deals if they're not dealt with). This thing that I'm holding onto that I know is a big deal though, I don't know exactly what it is. I know I need to let go, but I don't know of what. But I guess here's where I need to let go of my every possible mental projection of the future and trust God with every option. Maybe someday He will make it clear what I need to let go of but one thing I know is that He is asking me to hold onto Him now and forever. And He has promised to hold onto me too. Ahh. What a relief because I don't like letting go. But when it's to be able to hold something I know is better, I think I can bear it.

Seasons: The Future

So about the future. I obviously don't know it so it makes sense that this one might be a little shorter (or longer-it could logically go either way, I just went with shorter). There are litterally (at least) a hundred different ways it could go. After the internship I'm doing, I might stay on there. Or I might come back here. If I come back here I could work, go away to college, take classes from home, live with my parents, move out with some friends, get some kind of certification and work a more specific job, come back to the office job I have now, etc. Or I could move to CA and live with some family and find a job with some distant cousins. Or I could move to some other random state and adventure there. The list of possibilities goes on and on. What sounds best to me right now is to do one of the aforementioned options that have to do with moving back here but we really will see won't we.

Thankful Thursday: Sweet heart hurts.

I was going to say "Happy Thursday to you!" And if you're having a happy Thursday, good for you. In the sense of wishing someone a happy day I suppose I do wish you that. However, I do not mean that I feel happy on this Thursday. So maybe more like "Thoughtful and introspective Thursday!" Doesn't sound as nice as "Happy Thursday" but that's okay. I'm not particularly happy on this Thursday and for fear of tempting you to judge whether or not my reason for not being happy is legitimate or not (some people feel like they have that position, you know) I won't go into the details of why. I will say that I miss somebody today. More than just one; I miss him and his whole family. Without going into more detail on that, I'll tell you that my heart hurts today. The why is irrelevant for the sake of what I'm trying to say; but it does hurt. There are at least two kinds of heart hurts I think: ( There is good news though beca...

We Meet Again

Well, to say that it feels weird to be here again is an understatement. This is a little emotional for me and I'll try to explain why. Firstly, it's been a while since the last time I wrote here. When I typed the address into the search bar, I was actually surprised that a 404 page didn't show up and that, instead, I saw a familiar title and design come up on the screen. There it was - my own writing, published on a web page I undoubtedly spent hours adjusting and tweaking until it was just right, down to the blue and green squares I painted by hand, scanned into a computer and digitized the old fashioned way with....wait for it.....*Microsoft Paint*. Illustrator? Pshht. Who needs that when you've got the grandmother of graphic design tools for FREE on your receptionist job work computer? (sarcasm, of course. Adobe, baby, I love you.) But even the details and designs of this page speak to the reason why this is emotional for me. All of the things about this blog that ...

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