I don't know why, but last night it just hit me that it's almost the end of August. Not to mention all that the passing time entails and means for me personally, but let's just be in awe for a minute that it's almost the end of August!
*1 minute pause for awe
Time passing is a fascinating thing to me. So I was just looking back over the blog archives and I decided to do a summary of what this year has held so far.
(I've linked every month to the archived posts from that month.)
Janurary: January was pretty much all over the place for me this year. VERRY dramatic and that's not really normal for me. I had to get over some things, and I accepted some new things in their place. There were a lot of things that the Lord worked on and broke loose in my heart in January, things that held me back and decieved me. He opened my eyes alot. It was dramatic but also very good. I learned to lean on the Lord a lot starting in January in a way I had never relied on Him before. It was good. But hard.
February: In February, I missed a lot. I missed people a lot. I was sort of unhappy with where I was in life at that time. And in February it dawned on me that time would not stand still and I wouldn't be in this place forever. Time would keep moving and eventually it would be time for me to go to the internship that I'm planning to go to in January 2013. And that's when I started really treasuring where I am now and what season I am in.
March: March was pretty prophetic for me in the sense that I now see how God was preparing my heart beforehand for some hardships that came along in that month. Just looking at my blog, the posts Real and Feeling Better were posted before this really hard-to-hear news came. Then I wrote How Do You Feel About That? which pretty well describes how I felt deep down for the rest of that month and into the next . . . Basically it was concerning a guy. It was one of the most painful times for me and I really can't put my finger on why this was so much more painful than other things like it. It just cut me deep. I think I'm still figuring out/realizing why.
April: I obviously didn't write too many blog posts in April. And as the month went on, I got better. The pain wasn't so sharp and it almost seemed to melt as the world around me did from Winter into Spring. It still hurt, but it wasn't on a nerve, I guess. The Lord showed me really really clearly that He's watching out for me. I got a new job that was much needed. I took a trip to Kansas City with a friend over Spring Break to visit the International House of Prayer and some friends who live there. That trip was just really good for me even though it was hard in some ways.
May: May was more uplifting than April for me. I house sat with some friends which was a BLAST. I got to get closer with a friend that I hadn't communicated with in a while. I started getting more serious about blogging because I realized that I didn't have to take it so seriously all the time. I would find the Holy Spirit in the middle of random thoughts and He drew me to Himself in a new way in May. He showed me a new perspective of Himself and the fact that my relationship with Him isn't some regimented, scheduled out and fit-in-a-box kind of thing. It is a relationship in which you go with the flow. Mostly in May He showed me that He was much bigger than my expectations.
June: June was blissful, I'd say. My mom and sister got out of school, and camp started. I had almost a month off of work to be a counselor at camp for a week and then to go on my family vacation to Cali. It was such a sweet time. It stirred my desire for adventure and travel and that still hasn't died. I'd say there's definitely some trips ahead of me. I saw All of my Aunts, Uncles and Cousins on my dad's side and that was just awesome. It's always a good time with them, and a blessing too might I add.
July: July was really good too. I spent the 4th driving through San Fransisco and on the Golden Gate Bridge for crying out loud! We were still on vacation until the 10th so there's about half the month. I did a lot of writing in July- partly because I was inspired by being on the road and in California (who wouldn't be?). I listened to lots of music in July.
August: The beginning of August was sort of rough again. The last week of camp was the first week of August and the week after that is always kind of rough since you're going through withdrawals. Plus, the Lord MADE me lean on Him. I mean I could've leaned the other way and had a wrong response I guess. What I'm saying is, some things really sucked for me at the beginnnig of August (relationships-wise) and my only real option was to lean on the Lord (which is good cause that's what I'm supposed to be doing anyway). My heart was vulnerable right on down to the very depths of it, but Jesus just held it in His hands until the storm blew over and I could breathe again. I guess I'm still learning how to react to that storm but I trust that He'll help me. So that brings us to now.
Now what?
Now I'm at work, on a Friday, soooooOOOO excited that it's Labor Day weekend and that I have awesome friends and a stellar book to read and a blog to be able to write on. And I'm pretty happy that whoever invented pizza did so. And im pretty ready to party.
Oh yeah, and a 50% off sale at Goodwill on Monday that I guess I might go to. . .
*1 minute pause for awe
Time passing is a fascinating thing to me. So I was just looking back over the blog archives and I decided to do a summary of what this year has held so far.
(I've linked every month to the archived posts from that month.)
Janurary: January was pretty much all over the place for me this year. VERRY dramatic and that's not really normal for me. I had to get over some things, and I accepted some new things in their place. There were a lot of things that the Lord worked on and broke loose in my heart in January, things that held me back and decieved me. He opened my eyes alot. It was dramatic but also very good. I learned to lean on the Lord a lot starting in January in a way I had never relied on Him before. It was good. But hard.
February: In February, I missed a lot. I missed people a lot. I was sort of unhappy with where I was in life at that time. And in February it dawned on me that time would not stand still and I wouldn't be in this place forever. Time would keep moving and eventually it would be time for me to go to the internship that I'm planning to go to in January 2013. And that's when I started really treasuring where I am now and what season I am in.
March: March was pretty prophetic for me in the sense that I now see how God was preparing my heart beforehand for some hardships that came along in that month. Just looking at my blog, the posts Real and Feeling Better were posted before this really hard-to-hear news came. Then I wrote How Do You Feel About That? which pretty well describes how I felt deep down for the rest of that month and into the next . . . Basically it was concerning a guy. It was one of the most painful times for me and I really can't put my finger on why this was so much more painful than other things like it. It just cut me deep. I think I'm still figuring out/realizing why.
April: I obviously didn't write too many blog posts in April. And as the month went on, I got better. The pain wasn't so sharp and it almost seemed to melt as the world around me did from Winter into Spring. It still hurt, but it wasn't on a nerve, I guess. The Lord showed me really really clearly that He's watching out for me. I got a new job that was much needed. I took a trip to Kansas City with a friend over Spring Break to visit the International House of Prayer and some friends who live there. That trip was just really good for me even though it was hard in some ways.
May: May was more uplifting than April for me. I house sat with some friends which was a BLAST. I got to get closer with a friend that I hadn't communicated with in a while. I started getting more serious about blogging because I realized that I didn't have to take it so seriously all the time. I would find the Holy Spirit in the middle of random thoughts and He drew me to Himself in a new way in May. He showed me a new perspective of Himself and the fact that my relationship with Him isn't some regimented, scheduled out and fit-in-a-box kind of thing. It is a relationship in which you go with the flow. Mostly in May He showed me that He was much bigger than my expectations.
June: June was blissful, I'd say. My mom and sister got out of school, and camp started. I had almost a month off of work to be a counselor at camp for a week and then to go on my family vacation to Cali. It was such a sweet time. It stirred my desire for adventure and travel and that still hasn't died. I'd say there's definitely some trips ahead of me. I saw All of my Aunts, Uncles and Cousins on my dad's side and that was just awesome. It's always a good time with them, and a blessing too might I add.
July: July was really good too. I spent the 4th driving through San Fransisco and on the Golden Gate Bridge for crying out loud! We were still on vacation until the 10th so there's about half the month. I did a lot of writing in July- partly because I was inspired by being on the road and in California (who wouldn't be?). I listened to lots of music in July.
August: The beginning of August was sort of rough again. The last week of camp was the first week of August and the week after that is always kind of rough since you're going through withdrawals. Plus, the Lord MADE me lean on Him. I mean I could've leaned the other way and had a wrong response I guess. What I'm saying is, some things really sucked for me at the beginnnig of August (relationships-wise) and my only real option was to lean on the Lord (which is good cause that's what I'm supposed to be doing anyway). My heart was vulnerable right on down to the very depths of it, but Jesus just held it in His hands until the storm blew over and I could breathe again. I guess I'm still learning how to react to that storm but I trust that He'll help me. So that brings us to now.
Now what?
Now I'm at work, on a Friday, soooooOOOO excited that it's Labor Day weekend and that I have awesome friends and a stellar book to read and a blog to be able to write on. And I'm pretty happy that whoever invented pizza did so. And im pretty ready to party.
Oh yeah, and a 50% off sale at Goodwill on Monday that I guess I might go to. . .